This has becoming a defining feature of my life, to be on the road. Travel. Travel. Travel. Go, go, go. This does things to a person that are difficult to explain for many reasons. First, you lose connections, everyone is at the end of a flight and the end of a flight could be the end of a relationship. Everything is a singular moment.
My life feels like a collection of singular moments strung together making something, making meaning, making time pass, making reality come together before I lose the thread of it on a flight in a distant country.
I am so many places now.
This year I have already covered five countries and ten cities. It's barely April and I will keep going. Who is to say what the end of the year will have wrought. After the work, the hours, the years invested in making something like a career I have managed exactly what I wanted to manage. There is a sense of success.
I HAVE ACHIEVED SOMETHING.
But what have I lost to achieve?
The thing that is most striking is the human element. The human connection. How do you connect with people when your life is 24 hours on the ground.
How do you connect with people when the modern age is staring into small screens, social media, internet transience. Social media is the death of socialization. I no longer socialize with the world around me as the world is lost in their boxes, in the bright shiny lights. I miss the conversation in a bar.
I miss the stranger as friend.
I've found a new freedom in my age and in my travels and have found it harder and harder to connect. To find connect.
Still, I wouldn't trade it. What does that tell me.
Eight hour layovers. I know the airport well enough to treat it like a second home. Not even just one of them. All of them. All of them. I know them.
Saturday, April 01, 2017