Sunday, April 01, 2018

Moonlight

The loud-quiet sounds of panting are filling the room as we pull apart from each other, sweat cooling suddenly in the room; the space between us seems suddenly so vast and the light in the room so bright.


Cord dangling from my hand and I pull and pull, lifting up the blind that blocks out the night sky, an evening free of obfuscation and clouds, an evening full of talk, laughter and embrace. 

"Here come hold me, look."

Arms wrapped around bodies, back to front, front to back, and the moonlight in the window shining down on both of us, throwing blue light that combines with the candles to suddenly make the bed feel bright. There is no darkness here now. 

Warm breath against my neck. 

"A full moon."

"Yes, making love under the full moon, surely there is lunacy in that," I respond and snuggle into a warm arm. 

A small laugh. 

"Have you ever wondered why the moon gets such a bad rap. Lunacy and lunatics and the madness of the full moon. Beware the full moon, for it brings out the crazies." 

"Because it changes. We don't like change."

"That's true."

"You can see it changing, going and coming back, and going again. Predictable but changing. Never quite the same."

"I suppose that is true. The sun is constant."

"The sun never changes, never leaves us. Maybe that's why the sun doesn't go hand in hand with madness. We are used to seeing it float there all the time. Always watching, never letting us get away with anything."

"Which explains why there is so much madness when the sun does change."

"Yes."

Lips against the back of my neck, and arms around me. Eyes closed and the milky white moonlight presses against the thin membrane, making shadows that dance against the pressure of my closed eyes. 

"Yes."

And here, in this evening I am changing again, and it is lunacy, and it is madness, and it is terrifying and full of the ever oppressive fear and risk of change. And the hands around me, and the quiet conversation, and the laughter, make it all the more interesting to embrace the change. 

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